June 20 // Helping Picky Eaters (some personal experience)

some tips for helping kids feel confident with food

Hello! This is Hope, the founder of Family Scripts. As we get closer to finishing a month focusing on health and strength, I know many of you are saying “Ha! My kid won’t eat anything other than McNuggets!”
As a kid—and young adult—I was a very picky eater, so please allow me to share some of my story and encourage you.

Some kids have more sensitivities than others, right? (My friend Jessica from A Cup of Ambition just wrote a very helpful article about raising highly sensitive kids.) I was (and am) a highly sensitive person. For me, all flavors were overwhelming. Do you know my favorite foods growing up? White pasta with squeeze butter. Chicken nuggets. Pizza without sauce. Box mac ‘n’ cheese, but only particular shapes. (Yep.) I liked most fruits, but no vegetables, under any circumstances…except for corn on the cob or French fries.

I remember avoiding birthday parties because I feared people would make fun of me since I couldn’t eat pizza. I felt so nervous about going to friends’ houses—or visiting a future boyfriend’s family for dinner someday!—because I knew I wouldn’t be able to eat whatever was served at mealtimes. I couldn’t gag in front of everyone! Also, I wanted to see the world…but insulting international hosts because I was scared of their food? Impossible! My picky eating had a serious effect on my social life and personal confidence.

I was genuinely afraid of most food because I was afraid of the taste. I was the pickiest person I knew and nobody understood. I felt like people just thought I was a spoiled brat. I had very disordered eating that’s now known as Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID.)

I was in college before I had a taco. Married before I had a real vegetable. 21 before I liked beans. I had my first soup at 29. As you might notice from the lack of salads in the Thursday Meal Inspiration emails, I still have a long way to go with my leafy greens 😉

But as you’ve probably noticed more obviously, I love a great variety of foods now! It took time, patience, and even a lot of tears, but I realized that my sensitivity to taste is actually a gift. I can really pick up on flavors and now I enjoy food a lot!

If you have picky eaters—or if you are a picky eater—I want to invite you to believe that you can enjoy a whole new world of flavors and nutrients, even if it feels impossible. You just haven’t found foods you like yet. Here are some tips (and I mentioned some more in the May 5th post, “Creativity in the Kitchen.”)

Make simple goals, such as “one new vegetable per year.”

When I got married eleven years ago, I made the goal to enjoy one new vegetable per year, but I had to figure out a way I liked the veggie prepared first. The first vegetable I loved was sweet potatoes, sautéed with garlic powder and smoked paprika. Next I learned to enjoy spinach smoothies. The year after that, I realized I like roasted carrots and herbs. One vegetable per year feels like slow progress, but it adds up! And now I’ll say “yes” to almost any dish involving a vegetable that I like.

Choose foods that are actually appetizing to your kids (without the help of a ton of sugar.)

You don’t need to go from Lunchables to tofu, or from cafeteria food to packed salads. Lettuce is mostly water, and salad dressings can be packed with sugar and oils.
There’s no pressure to make your kids eat foods that have to be slathered with less-healthy foods in order for your kids to like them.
It might help to reevaluate your grocery and eating-out budgets (and how those budgets are being spent.) Maybe you can reallocate half of your takeout budget to dining at a nicer restaurant every once in awhile? A well-prepared dish can help your kid fall in love with a new food for the first time!

If they won’t eat veggies, serve fruit.

Fruit is packed with good things for your kids, and eating fresh fruit will fill them up much more quickly than Wavy Lay’s could. If your kid gags on a carrot but they’ll munch on an apple, that’s a win.
If your kids are pretty deep in sugar/salt/fat addiction, it might take time for them to like other foods, but once their bodies aren’t craving all that stuff anymore, it’s easier to consider grapes a delicious snack or even dessert.
Snacking platters are great because they’re a non-intimidating way to try new foods. Chances are, they’ll at least like the fruit!

Let the kids be involved with making the food.

In How Eskimos Keep Their Babies Warm, journalist Mei-Ling Hopgood shares some of the distinctive ways that various cultures parent their kids. The chapter on France—“How the French Teach Their Kids to Children to Love Healthy Food”—is very enlightening. The two biggest secrets: serve well-prepared food and let the kids be involved with the cooking.

If your kid spends half an hour making a dish, they’re invested. They’re familiarized with the ingredients. They’ve smelled some good smells. They will be much more likely to feel less intimidated by the food and give it a try. This is a huge tip, and it’s we’ll be sharing how to do an At-Home Kids Cooking Camp later this week. 🙌

Present it beautifully.

I have a picky eater, so a big goal for when I’m serving her food is that she’ll look at it and say “Yum!” even if she’s never had it before. Making food colorful—which could actually indicate a variety of nutrients!—and adding garnishes helps the kid feel like you’re presenting them with something that you put a lot of love and care into…because you have!

There are few things we could spend our time with that would impact our kids’ present and future health and happiness more. It’s worth your time to help them love good food!

It’s not too late.

Your kid can still be a functioning child and even adult if they don’t eat a wide variety of foods. But you might be surprised by just how many positive changes you’ll see if your kids start eating a little better. It’s not too late to start helping them feel brave enough to eat foods that will make them feel good. If your child likes zero vegetables at 12, and she does the one-veg-a-year challenge, think about how many vegetables she will love—and know how to prepare—by the time she moves out!

If you don’t know where to start, check out our Meal Inspiration posts! As you now know, they’re curated and tested by a former very picky eater who still has struggles…but who also loves at least 11 vegetables 😉

Thanks for reading! Hopefully this encouraged you. You can do it!

Warmly,

Hope from Family Scripts

P.S. Feel free to send this to a friend who has picky eaters!