To the person who struggles to love his or her body...

plus some simple watercolor ideas and other goodies

Hello! It’s swim season, which can also mean despairing-about-your-body season. In a month talking about health—which involves every part of you!—I hope this email helps you have a healthy view of your own body and appearance.

To the person who struggles to love his or her body:

We want to be the kind of humans and raise the kinds of humans who love imperfect people, right? We want to be compassionate and love others unconditionally? Let that kindness extend to the person you see in the mirror, not as who you will be but who you are right now. Your kids are watching how we talk about wrinkles and cellulite and muffin tops…Let’s teach them that we don’t disparage people based on imperfections.

Your body is magnificent. It can do so many things. Take some time to be amazed by it. When you go on a hike or an outdoor stroll, you can be proud of yourself for your body’s ability to transport you to beautiful sights…including if you’re in a wheelchair or use other kinds of support. You might feel like your body is no good when you’re in a fitting room trying to squeeze into a dress, but if your body is able to get you to a waterfall or a beautiful view? Your hands can make a meal, write kind words or paint a masterpiece? Your voice can sing beautiful songs or speak life? What a wonderful, useful gift! Your body is a gift to the world, right now, as it is, even if it doesn’t look the way you want it to.

If you’re feeling insecure about your body or appearance, you’re joining the company of…just about everyone. Whether you weigh 300 pounds or 180 or 99, there are people who have your same insecurities, and they are looking for someone who looks like them so they can talk about their own bodies and feelings to someone who understands. Some people feel like they simply can’t relate to a super-toned person, and some super-toned people feel like they can’t relate to someone who doesn’t prioritize fitness. Ideally we would all be able to get along regardless of appearance, but we can’t deny the reality that what you look like, right now, in this season of life, makes you more approachable to some people. You might be able to make another person feel more safe and comfortable. That’s a gift.

Remember, too, that body ideals are trendy. Your shape might not look like people on the red carpet, but if you visit an art museum, chances are you might see yourself as the cultural standard of beauty in seventeenth-century Italy, or in ancient Egypt. Seek to be healthy, but don’t let idealized images hold sway in your perception of yourself. They’re temporary anyway.

The kind of people you want to be friends with care most about the heart. They care more about how you treat them than how you look. In a personal post about wrinkles, I shared an inspiring quote by a woman who has set the record for the fastest time to complete the Appalachian Trail. Listen to this wisdom:

“I didn’t carry a mirror, and I didn’t have billboards or magazines or commercials telling me what I should look like. For five months, my reflection was my interaction with other hikers. And if I was kind or if I was funny, if I could make someone else smile, it made me feel pretty.”
-Jennifer Pharr Davis, Into America’s Wild documentary

How you make people feel is a much more accurate measure of your beauty and grace than your bathroom mirror is. Your appearance does not disqualify you from loving people well.

If you are making big strides to feel better and bulk up or slim down—I’m personally trying to do the latter!—I hope you know that you have loved ones who are cheering you on and want you to feel good. You might eyeroll when people overshare their fitness progress on social media, but your mom might want you to send a picture of a grocery cart filled with healthy foods. Your spouse might want a sweaty selfie every time you work out. Many of your followers might want to see an appetizing meal that you made. Find people who are encouraged by your personal growth, and invite them to cheer you on. You never know what kind of ripple effect that will have, too.

Showing your loved ones—especially your kids—that you want to have more energy and feel stronger teaches them a lot about being self-motivated. And if your fitness aspirations are becoming a toxic obsession? You can show them how to deal with that, too. They are going to deal with body problems when they get older, too, so your own health journey is like the classroom for them.

You’re seen, dear reader. I am cheering you on ❤️

Yummy Food: Smoothie Bowls

Frozen fruit is the health, ease, and frugality hack that I’ll forever applaud. And smoothie bowls are a great chance to use it. Combine whatever fruits you desire—mango and banana are the creamiest—and consider throwing in generous handfuls of spinach. (I’m 31 years old and still despise salad 🤪 but I, and even my pickiest eaters, absolutely devour spinach smoothies.)

Spoon the smoothie into bowls and grab some toppings such as granola, chia seeds, hemp hearts, sliced almonds, fruit, etc. and layer them in artfully. Trader Joe’s is my favorite stop for frozen fruit and all the toppings. (Their coconut granola is amaaazing.) You can even let your family build their own bowls by setting it all up as a buffet. My kids have requested this meal every single day lately.

By the way, if you’re wondering if one of those high-powered blenders is worth it, I’m on year 10 of owning a Vitamix and it’s still going strong as ever. You can even use it to grind your own wheat flour, if you’re into that 😅

Activity Idea: Easy Watercolor Bookmarks

This activity is so easy that I’m almost embarrassed to share, but my kids and I have spent hours and hours making watercolor bookmarks lately, and my lack of natural talent hasn’t been holding us back, because our latest projects are so easy. Three secret ingredients help tremendously:

• Water. It is majorly satisfying to put a small droplet of paint on a wet piece of watercolor paper and watch the pigment spread. And when it dries, it looks so cool. You and your kids alike will have a blast experimenting with this.

• Masking tape. Tape down your watercolor paper while painting. This allows the paper to stay flat instead of curling, and once you remove the tape, it creates a really neat white frame that makes your piece look like official, intentional, art 😉

• Metallic watercolors. It hurts to spend $11-14 or so on just a few colors, but teach your kids to use them sparingly for a gorgeous effect. A streak of gold in a blue-and-black night sky, or in a rainbow, or on a gemstone. Small shimmering stripes on a bookmark.

You can even write a little encouraging phrase or message in the white margin, and, of course, on the back.

One way to add some magic to a watercolor gradient is to use an archival marker or ultra-fine Sharpie to add some trees or a city skyline to the bottom of a sunset/sunrise. These make great gifts for people who love their city or a place they’ve visited.

My kids and I love sending mail, so it’s been a delight to have a little buffet of all our pieces to choose from to stuff inside letters.

When we figure out a method or design we like, we make a whole bunch of them! Watercolor bookmarks are made easily by investing in a paper slicer, we get at least twelve mini-canvases out of every sheet of watercolor paper. These are all made by my seven-year-old, and they’re going to be a delight to whoever receives them in their mailbox ⬇️

Personal Greetings

Well, this was a bit of a long one, but I hope it encouraged you! I am definitely someone who struggles with my personal appearance and I’ve had those dizzying moments in the fitting room where even the larger-size-than-I-was-hoping was too small, and it just felt like my whole sense of self was crumbling. But I do also want to feel good! I feel like I have to fight unhelpful thinking from both extremes of body-shaming and body-positivity, but it helps when I seek health in all areas of my life and think about my body less in general.

I’m grateful for each one of you.

Last night I went to a house show to see two of my favorite songwriters/poets (Son of Laughter and Andy Squyres) and the whole experience was so powerful and rich. I hope you get some sweet and meaningful moments this week; I’d love to hear about them.

Warmly,

Hope from Family Scripts ❤️