Things to Do With Kids When You're Tired (+ some tips for when you're on your cycle)
Some ideas + mind shifts for horizontal parenting
Hello! Every email from Family Scripts is intended to feel like a hug; August’s emails even more. This tends to be a hard, awkward month. Today’s post might be especially helpful for women who are pregnant right now—extra hugs for all the summer discomforts 🥵—or if you dread your monthly period and all the energy it drains from you. Or if you have an autoimmune disease…or if you’re just tired.
We’ve talked about how some seasons of life are more draining than others, and maybe you find yourself in a season where you feel like you’ve been hit with a horse tranquilizer. Just no energy. Maybe you need to take B12 or eat better, sure, but there’s such a thing as unpreventable circumstances that just take and take and take from you. How are you supposed to thrive—much less care for other kids—when you’re going through something like that!?
Tips for Tired Seasons
I’ve been there (see pic at the bottom of this email) and here are some tips that have helped:
Baby-proof and go minimalist on one room where you can close the door and lay down while your little ones crawl around on you.
Make food shortcuts where you can that won’t make you feel terrible (paper plates, make double portions when you do cook so you have leftovers, stock up on Trader Joe’s freezer meals, etc.)
Choose quality screen time that won’t make your kids become more annoying. Youtube tends to be a pretty bad babysitter that intentionally harms your child’s attention and makes them more materialistic; show kids good movies and shows that you can enjoy with them. PBS Kids isn’t the worst. (Odd Squad and Dino Dana on Amazon Prime are some of our favorites.) Studio Ghibli G-rated movies are also great; My Neighbor Totoro might be a new family fave.
Mother’s helpers are cheaper than babysitters because there’s still a parent at home; ask anyone you know with connections in the homeschool community if they know of any teens or tweens—bonus if they come from a large family and have a lot of experience—who would charge, like, $7-10 an hour to keep an eye on your kids while you rest. It’s a big blessing to a person who’s too young to babysit, and you don’t have to make nearly as much of a financial commitment as a nanny.
Games to Play With Kids While Laying Down
Have you ever heard of horizontal parenting? 😅 It’s a thing; there’s even a book about it. My order didn’t arrive in time for this article, but Lay Down Daddy also looks like it has some really creative ideas. Doesn’t it make you feel better that many other parents have days where they just can’t get out of bed, also? Here are a few ideas.
Pharaoh
I invented this one when my little brother and I were younger so I could get a break, ha! We played this so many times over the years. We would take turns pretending to be a Pharaoh (mummy), and the other person would build a “pyramid” on top of us with pillows. Then the Pharaoh would wake up and escape from the pillows! It adds extra fun (and time) if your kids pile on top of you while you “try” to escape. (We all know that you don’t actually need to try, ha!)
Bonus: It takes awhile to find all the pillows in the house and then put them back, but it’s kind of a fun goose chase for kids.
Mama Cat
Pretend to be a snoozing cat whose little kittens like to cuddle up next to her and crawl all over her. You can tell your kittens to go chase some mice, lap up some milk from the imaginary bowl in the corner, clean their fur, go look out the window for any interesting visitors, etc.
Spa Business
Tell your kids that their job is to have a spa business that makes their customers as comfy as possible. If they do an extra great job, they just might get a tip! (A quarter or two means a whole lot for a little kid 😉)
Lay on top of a towel and set out some lotion—cheap lotion, because they’ll probably use a lot of it—and let them massage your arms and legs. You can give them some hints of what makes a good spa, such as dimming the lights, playing calm music, providing snacks and water…you might actually have a very peaceful time!
This might also be a good time to encourage your kids to work on starting a business in general. We shared a whole post about this the other day. You could be their first customer for a Laundry Folding Company!
Measuring With Anything
This idea is from @MamaPsychologists. Invite your kids to measure things in the room—or themselves, or you—with measuring tape or even other items in the room. How many shoes long is one wall? How many cheese sticks does it take to measure someone’s leg? Etc.
Cloud Watching
This is one of those things that we loved in childhood but might forget to introduce to our own kids. If your kids are old enough to lay still for awhile, take them outside and look for shapes in the clouds. If you need to stay inside and pretend that you see clouds, that works too 😉
Reading Aloud and Audiobooks!
Reading aloud is a lot easier than playing tag or pretending to be interested in a game of Candyland, right!? Plus, if you can’t even manage to read in this season, maybe audiobooks are what you need! Listen to good stories together. Switching between audiobooks and reading aloud, my kids and I were able to go through the whole Wingfeather Saga in only two months when I was pregnant with Baby #4 in 2018. It was such a nice break. Reading aloud doesn’t get enough credit for being easy. You literally get to just sit for a long time 😅
I’d love to hear any “horizontal parenting” ideas you have, too!
Embracing Your Cycle’s Seasons
Here’s some quick advice for women who are menstruating: view each week of your menstrual cycle as seasons. I couldn’t link to any articles because they all tended to overmysticize this 😬 but I think there’s value in leaning into your season instead of just dreading Aunt Flo’s bothersome visit. For many women, the seasons of menstruation look like:
Summer (ovulatory phase): Higher energy, you look and feel the most confident. Embrace the positivity, try harder workouts, and enjoy! During this time when you might feel more social, let people know how much they mean to you.
Fall (luteal phase): You’re preparing for slower times. You’re maybe nesting a little to get ready. Fall is awesome so this might not translate, but your face might break out and you might feel irritable (even unreasonable.) Invite others to show you extra grace in this time, and acknowledge that maybe you are gaining insights into things that need to change. Just give it some time to process.
Winter (bleeding phase): If you prepare for this time—get chocolates, bananas, and other good snacks ready, have your house ready for you to take a break, etc.—you might be surprised by how much you enjoy it. As much as your work demands allow, let yourself rest. Maybe do stretching workouts (if any) instead of what you might’ve been doing two weeks ago. Try get some time alone if you can—or do some of the “horizontal parenting” ideas above. Keep your journal handy. You might come up with some extra good thoughts during this time.
Spring (follicular phase): This time kind of feels like a fresh start. What are some projects you can give extra attention to? Want to hop back into a more intense exercise regimen? Is there anything you feel like you need to do with the insights you’ve jotted down recently?
Maybe you don’t relate to any of this, or maybe the seasons are totally different, or maybe you think this is all hogwash. Either way, I invite you to look a little closer at unavoidable things in your life that bother you and see if there’s a way that you can embrace them instead of dread them.
I hope something in this post resonated with you! If so, would you mind sharing it?
Thanks so much!
Warmly,
Hope from Family Scripts
P.S. Want to see a picture of how big I used to get in my pregnancies? This was for baby #4. Nope, not twins 😅 If you’re pregnant and feeling super uncomfortable and miserable, you’re not alone. It’ll probably be a funny memory one day…a moment of “Wow, that was hard; I don’t know how I got through that!” Valiance in-progress. Hugs again ❤️
