Bravely Creating Even When You're Not Good At It (and Enjoying Good Art Together)
ignorance and incompetence are actually advantages
I once tried to make Himalayan cuisine, but I used so much peppermint extract in the chicken biryani that the dish tasted like toothpaste.
A few Christmases ago, I acted in a living nativity and had to repeat the same line over twenty times to the different passing groups…but I only got it right maybe twice.
Last weekend, I tried to paint mushrooms to give out as bookmarks, but they all ended up looking…inappropriate 😳
Some things come naturally to me, but others—like skills pertaining to the arts—just don’t seem to work out. Maybe you can relate?
But I want to show you some ways that totally lacking knowledge or skill is actually a huge advantage. Seriously! When you come to the table empty-handed, you get to learn and grow with your kids.
You can say things like:
“Neither of us knows how to watercolor, so let’s learn together.”
“Something I just figured out is that it looks better if I do this.”
“I have no clue where to even start. There’s no shame in looking up a tutorial or inspiration piece!”
“Whoa, how did you do that? Teach me!”
“I don’t really know anything about that artist, but maybe we should look her up.”
“Okay, that didn’t turn out how I thought it would, but we’ll try again.”
“Wow wow wow, that painting is cool!”
“I think I’m getting better at this. Check out how much better my daisies look today than they did a week ago.”
“Ha, that meal did not work out! At least it made a fun memory!”
“Some people progress more quickly than others. This isn’t coming naturally to me, so if I want to get good at this, maybe I need to practice three times as much as someone who is wired differently, but that’s okay! Everybody’s different.”
Creativity is contagious, and being creative together is a great way to model humility, bravery, and persistence. Keep in mind, too, that parenting is easier and more effective when you enjoy it, so choose creative endeavors that you’ll actually like.
Now let’s talk about something that’s easier than trying to paint mushrooms:
If you want to become more creative, put good art in front of your eyeballs, in your earshot, and on your tastebuds.
Balancing “Good Art” with Age-Appropriateness
We need to be cautious about screen time, for sure, but it’s a great way to expose our kids to beautiful art and powerful stories. (Also, as we all know, it’s a helpful babysitter sometimes.)
As we approach media of all kinds, here are some helpful questions: “What is this doing for my kids?”, “Is this good art?”, and “Do I like it?”
If you’re not enjoying what your kids are watching/reading/listening to, maybe it’s not worth their attention either. Children’s programming might tack on the label “educational” but that doesn’t mean it’s actually nourishing your kids; it might be “safe” but that doesn’t mean it’s good.
When you are enjoying art together, however, you have more options for what you can show your kids that might be outside the typical genre. My kids and I go down the rabbit hole of OK Go music videos annually 😁
When reading books aloud, you can soften harsh words and make scary moments a little gentler. If you have young children in the home but want to enjoy a more mature book with your older kids, this is my favorite hack: share a pair of AirPods and listen to audiobooks together that might be less appropriate for little ears. While we drive in the car or clean the house, my oldest son and I are currently listening to some Ray Bradbury, and my oldest daughter and I recently finished Edith Pattou’s epic fairytale East.
There’s no pressure to get your kids into mature entertainment, learn about the ins and outs of every painter, or to try to become superstar artists, but this is your invitation: enjoy good art together, even if you’re bad at it.
I hope you (and I!) have a great week.
Warmly,
Hope from Family Scripts